April 14, 2005

Brain vomit

I hired a new assistant this week. Her name is nearly unpronounceable but her personality shines like like a newly minted penny and she loves being a paper pusher. She starts on Monday, and I cannot wait to hand things over to her and send First Assistant off into the sunset. First Assistant does seem to be regretting her decision these days...she has yet to find another job and has offered to stay until I have New Assistant trained and ready to step into her shoes. Big giant about face from 3 weeks ago when she was chomping at the bit to leave. I think she has suddenly realized that she had a pretty sweet deal for someone with little experience and no degree. I think she's also realized that her musician husband isn't going to be able to support the two of them on his occasional gigs.

I feel bad, fleetingly, if I think about it too much, but for the most part my feeling is that this is what she gets for being all "Oh, this company bores me and I want to follow my bliss and not work in an office." Don't say things like that to your boss if you don't already have something else lined up, dear. Take that life lesson and run with it.

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In other news, we finally joined the 21st century and got DSL. And I installed it and everything. And I'm sort of in love with my computer all over again now. Mmmm, fast.

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I've been thinking a lot lately about body issues and my Life as a Fat Girl, because this week for the first time I actually saw myself being able to leave that life. I've lost 25 pounds now, not enough for just anyone to notice, but enough for my engagement ring to already be a little looser and enough to make most of my pants and skirts need their waistbands taken in. I'm falling in love with my body, which surprises me because I never hated my body the way others have. (In rereading that last sentence, I realized it sounded like I meant others have hated my body, which I didn't mean. I meant that I haven't hated mine like others have hated theirs, but I suppose I also never hated my body the way some people probably do hate my body.) I've always loved the fact that my body is strong and healthy and curvy, but I've never really liked it. I haven't ever looked at any part of my body (aside from my boobs and my ankles, oddly) and really liked how it looked. But now I'm catching myself tracing the line of my jaw with a fingertip, caressing the shadow of a collarbone that keeps appearing, fondling the spot on my thigh that used to stick out just a bit more. And it's all just making me think.

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Someday soon I'll have enough brain power to sit and write the entry that's stewing in my head about all this. But these days, the only things filling my head are JournalCon details. JournalCon is my life.

Speaking of JournalCon, we started a NotifyList for the JCon site, so be sure to sign up so you're among the first to find out things like we updated the Committee Page with clever little blurbs (which we totally did, you should go read them).

And now I'm going to go have my snuggle time with my cats and my man, because I'm too tired for anything else.

posted by Melinda @ 9:28 PM