Those who know me well will not be surprised

I bought a wedding dress today. Correction: I bought MY wedding dress today.

It's white and has sparkles and is completely princessy, right down to the big ass cathedral train.

It's the complete opposite of the flowy, ivory, simple dress I thought I might be buying today. And it's absolutely perfect.

Who's a pretty, pretty princess?

I'm a pretty, pretty princess.

(And no, no pictures will be posted here....Kev does not get to see the dress, thankyouverymuch. Ask nicely and I might send some to you. Hah.)

This is your brain on Wedding Fluff

Okay fine. I'll admit what I'm sure you all have known for weeks despite the fact that I have TRIED SO HARD not to let it overtake this blog.

The Wedding has possessed me. Important parts of my brain have rerouted their functions entirely to considering how many invitations we should order and exactly what the wording on said invitations should me. Less important parts of my brain are obsessed with deciding between darling blue shoes for the wedding or sparkly silver ones, despite the fact that I do not yet have any idea what my dress will look like. I think my medulla oblongata is devoting itself almost wholeheartedly to contemplating favors and placecards and placecards that are favors. Wernicke's Area? Totally obsessed with the pros and cons of custom made supportive undergarments.

Tonight I placed a $650 order for prints of engagement pictures (amazingly, only $220 of that is for us, the rest is for our respective mothers). And Saturday I am descending into the fluffy underbelly of the wedding industry, where I will spend the afternoon wiggling in and out of big old satin dresses with innumerable buttons down my back. While I do this, my mother will get to sit and watch while holding back tears at how bee-yoo-ti-full her only daughter looks in the various concotions. Let me tell you though, if they bring me any strapless dresses, I am going to have to stand there and flap my arm wings at them to drive home the point that I really, REALLY want a damn dress with sleeves.

There is a teeny small part of my brain that is instead currently whining about the kittens that were born to my friend CC's cat this week. And the reason that teeny tiny part is whining for a kitten is because DUDE, KEV MIGHT BE BREAKABLE ON THE SUBJECT OF A THIRD CAT. If I can just get him over there to see how teeny tiny cute and mewling they are. I'm going to see them on Sunday (there's 8, if you can believe it) and take lots of pictures and try and convince him that we totally need another cat. Kitten!

Maybe that will assuage my urgent puppy longings that I've had lately. This is yet another reason why I know I don't want to have kids. You know how (some) women see a baby and get all ooey-gooey over them and start talking about aching woman parts biological clocks? That doesn't happen to me. I coo over them, yes...I think they're cute but I don't hold them and wish fervently that I had one. But put a kitten or a puppy anywhere near me and I have to practically be physically restrained to keep from smothering them with love.

I currently have a lovebug of a cat curled up next to my right arm just begging to be held and snuggled and smooched. Now that I can live with.

Right after I go check out the latest issue of Modern Bride for some centerpiece ideas.

I swear I'm not drunk

Last week, we did not go grocery shopping. Which is how I found myself on a Wednesday afternoon eating cinnamon twists from Taco Bell and wondering just what the hell they are made out of anyway. Deep fried styrofoam? Sweet pork rinds? Who knows. They are yet another of the mysteries of the universe that I will never understand. It seems like everyday it's something new for me and my fascination with weird wonderings, like who invented paperclips? And where can I buy some of that booger glue that magazines use to stick address labels on the front?

I obviously have too much time on my hands, right?

Kris was in town this weekend, and our reward for the 11 mile walk we did on Saturday was to go see The March of The Penguins on Sunday. You may think seals are cute, but you won't after you see the teeth on the ones in that movie. Oy. But it was an awesome movie. Penguins are some crazy-ass birds though, with the walking 70 miles in the snow over and over and the trying to steal babies from each other. They're pretty fantastic to watch. Yay penguins.

It's 11:00 at night and I should be in bed. But first I need to pack my lunch, because I don't think I can handle eating anything else that has an unknown origin like those cinnamon twists. How can something so mysterious be so yummy?

I don't know. Maybe that's my problem.

Comic Book Guys, Fundraising and 92 Pictures of Us

So we went to Comic-Con this weekend and yeah. Too much humanity in one place for me to handle for more than a very, very short amount of time. Interesting people watching though....I have to say my favorites were the Shaun of the Dead guy we saw inside and the two people dressed as Sims that we saw on our way back to the trolley. We stayed at the Con for 3 or 4 hours and then headed back home to crash for two hours of hard core napping. (Doesn't that sound like a lame AARP porn movie? "HARD CORE NAPPING, starring Ethel McBooby and Herbert Humperdink!") I did get a Tarnished Images print, the "Terra" one (with plans for aquiring the other three elemental fairies she has). It was good to see Sam though so it was still a good weekend, despite the plethora of people who prove that there is a reason why Comic Book Guy looks the way he does.

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I'm in a rare space right now...the apartment, the car, and my desk at work are all cleaned up at the same time. Not that this has helped me get more work done at work but hey, I did the dishes when I got home from a dinner out with friends tonight.

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BOOBIE FUNDRAISING ALERT

The lovely and talented Kythryne Aisling, she of the beautiful Wearable Sculpture jewelry line, has volunteered to create a pendant to be auctioned off. We'll be posting pictures and then doing a comments auction once it is completed. Whatever she ends up making, it will be gorgeous, I am sure of that...Kyth has created a couple of amazing pieces for me and will (hopefully) be doing my wedding jewelry for me once I find a damn dress for her to work with.

So here's what I'm thinking....I know there's more crafty and talented people out there in the blogosphere, and I would bet that there's more than a few of you who might have some goods and services you might be willing to donate.

Things I Think Would Be Good Auction Items:
Web design, of a blog or site
Prints of photos
Jewelry of any sort
Art of any sort
Things you've crocheted or knitted or otherwise made
Mix CDs (because some of you make amazing ones)
Etc etc

So, if you are so inclined to participate, I'll do one auction a day for each item donated to the cause. If you want to donate, email or comment, and if you know of someone else who might be able and willing to donate then pass the idea on to them too. Grazie, from me and my boobs.

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And last but not least, we finally got our engagement picture proofs online today.

And yes, you can totally check them out. As you'll notice, I seem to have been completely unable to stop laughing throughout the entire session.

So feel free to tell me which ones you like best. :-)

A call to action

You know, I woke up in a pretty decent mood this morning. I didn't work out but eh, whatever. I got out of the house on time, I had cute new shoes to wear, and it was promising to be another gorgeous sunny day. And then I got to work.

It wasn't work that brough me down today (well, it was, but not way down). What brought me down was something I came across during my post-morning-work flurry blog browsing session. I clicked over to see how Amalah and Squishy were doing, because Amy? Is a funny, funny girl who makes me smile. And she's an Internet "friend", one of those people who I met ever so briefly last year at JournalCon, a person I've exchanged a handful of emails with and whose life I am privy to when I read her blog.

She's also one of my Breast Cancer Three Day donors, and so I sent her a pink bracelet this week. I had no idea that the bracelet would mean as much to her as it does.

See, Amalah found out this week that her mother has breast cancer. And that totally, completely sucks ass. Her mother gets to spend the next few months dealing with surgery and radiation and then years of hard core durg regimens to keep it from coming back. Her doctors think they caught it in time, and her prognosis is good. But still.

The Susan G. Komen Foundation estimates that 211,450 women will be diagnosed with breast cancer in 2005. Amalah's mom is one of them. But thanks to years of research, much of it funded by the Komen Foundation, there are drugs out there to help cure her and there is new knowledge of what kind of treatments work best on each strain of breast cancer. Thanks to that same new knowledge, breast cancer now has an 87% 5-year survival rate attached to it. 87%. That's a beautiful number.

But I want to see that number go up to 90%, then up to 95%, then maybe even up to 100%. And that's why I'm walking in the Breast Cancer Three Day again this year. And next year, and the year after that, and the year after that, and probably the 20 years after that. Because I want women like Amalah's mom to get cured and go on to live healthy, productive lives. Because I don't want to see another woman my age memorialized after dying of breast cancer. Because I don't want any of the wise, wonderful, funny and fabulous women in my life to be taken away from me by this disease.

I'm woefully behind schedule on my fundraising, and I only have three months left. There are untapped resources here at home, but I want to appeal to my Internet friends again. So many of you have already donated, and I thank you for that. But if you haven't, and you have a spare $5 or $10 you can toss into my Breast Cancer Three Day fund, please do so. That money goes directly to Susan G. Komen and the National Philanthropic Trust, two of the top charities in the world.

Or if you need some sassy new summer gear, please go buy some Save the Boobies gear....all the proceeds from that shop are being deposited into my fundraising account.

Spread the word, tell your friends and family. I don't care who knows anymore, I just want to raise the damn money so I can get it to the Foundation. If you have fundraising ideas for me, toss at my email. I want to raise more this year than I did last year.

Thanks.

Nighttime is the right time...for spewage

I keep trying to think of something interesting or witty or mildly amusing to write about and all I can come up with is our new Litter Locker. Yeah, that was a big event around here, the purchase of the Litter Locker. Because have I mentioned that I have yet to get Riley fixed? And that while his lack of a full set of balls has stunted his growth and made him an incurable mama's boy as well as keeping him from starting that nasty habit of spraying, the one ball he does have makes his pee stink to high heaven. And he's dumb, so sometimes he forgets to cover it up completely, which is what led me to throw out the $90 auto-clean litter box because it was all open to everything and God, the stink! Anyway, I bought a new litterbox and then decided to bring home the Litter Locker. It's like a Diaper Genie for cats. Toss the litter in, turn the handle a time or two, and voila! No more stinky litter sitting and festering in the trash can, wrapped in a hastily tied plastic grocery bag.

In other news, I went and bought a tote bag today. Nothing too remarkable about that, except for the reason why I bought a tote bag.

I bought a tote bag so that I can always haul around the bridal porn and wedding planner that have become the central part of my organizational world. *sigh* I've become one of THOSE WOMEN.

Mea culpa, my bitches. The wedding has eaten my brain and there is nothing I or anyone else can do to prevent acts of craziness like buying tote bag purses so as to always have the wisdom of Martha Stewart at my finger tips when wondering what kind of placecards will work for outdoor weddings at locations that are often quite breezy. Because say what you will about Martha, she has some fabulous tricks up her sleeve when it comes to making crafty yet arty favors for the wedding of ones dreams.

Left turn, left turn!

We're going to Comic-Con this weekend, with one of Kev's friends and her boyfriend. Good times, good times. Where else can a lover of people watching like me see thousands of people of varying degrees of geekitude all gathered in one spot? I'm hoping to pick up another piece or two of art....the Tori Amos print and signed Brian Froud pictures in our living room all came from Comic-Con.

Plus I might get to see Ping, who I haven't seen in literally years.

Oh, and with my luck, we will also run into T. Yeaaaaaah, okay. There you go.

Next subject. Scandalous Uncle got married last weekend, and all reports are that A) it was a total redneck wedding and B) the Scandalous New Wife is rude and mean and the family Does Not Approve. As my mother and I discussed today, our family has never been rich, but they have always had manners and there has always been A Way Things Are Done, and Scandalous New Wife seems to have made Scandalous Uncle forget that fact. Mom also mentioned that she thinks that Scandalous Uncle is now suffering from Riley-itis, except missing BOTH balls since he is letting New Wife get away with saying some truly horrible things. Scandalous New Wife is literally the only person on my entire guest list that I hope against hope decides NOT to come to the wedding. Meh.

In closing, I would like to apologize to the person who dropped by here in search of Carissa's big boobies. Carissa's boobies are nowhere on this site, nor are anyone else's. Scoot along, you dirty old perv.

The world is full of idiots

Dear Karl Rove:

Okay, so technically, you didn't actually give Valerie Plame's name to the Washington Post reporter. But you told a reporter that her husband had a wife who worked at the agency. Did you really think that a Washington Post reporter wouldn't be able to figure out who she was just by checking some marriage records? You fucking idiot...just because you didn't say her name doesn't mean that you didn't cause her to be outed. God, I hope this is what finally brings your smarmy, slimy ass down from the pedestal you managed to slither onto.

Zoo, zoo, zoo tomorrow

Honeymoon hats,
originally uploaded by Minarae.

I added a bunch of pictures from last weekend...zoo pictures and engagement party pictures. They might make you smile, which after a day of news like we were treated to today might be a welcome departure.

(And from the purely cynical and jaded side of me....why is anyone surprised this has happened again? Does anyone really think that there will ever be a day when terrorism doesn't exist? It's tragic and it's scary and I feel terrible for the people having to live through this but...why are people surprised?)

Man, I can't wait for this weekend to be get here.

Ob la di, ob la dah

It's funny, you know? I open the website to write an update and then I sit and stare at the cursor on the screen and have no idea what to say. An unoriginal sentence, I know, but a true one. You'd think I would have tons of things to say since it's been more than a smidge of time since I last updated. And there is a lot to say, lots of good and great and meh and bah humbug things to say. And yet....the longer I stay away, the harder it is for me to pick up where I left off and get started again. So I sit and I stare at the screen and eventually a bunch of gobbledygook comes pouring out of my fingertips, which mostly doesn't make sense and totally isn't related to each other.

How's the weather treating you? Hot yet? Then you probably don't want to hear about how it still hasn't managed to get out of the mid 70's here, at least in my neighborhood. We had a gorgeous weekend last weekend, which was perfect, since Kev's mom was in town and we were spending the majority of the weekend outdoors. Engagement party went well and everyone had a good time. Engagement pictures went awesomely, and I cannot WAIT for our damn proofs so we can let you all see them too. Our photographers are just...awesome. Here's a story that will tell you how cool they are...Nate started telling us that our wedding is smack in the middle of a crazy two weeks for them. Turns out that the week before the wedding he and a bunch of friends are getting together for a week long last hurrah road trip for a friend of theirs....who's about to become a priest. How can you not like someone who sends their friend off to the priesthood after a week of manly misbehavior?

So anyway, the pictures went well and despite the fact that I'm sure I will look at them all and say "Hey, I'm still fat, what's up with that??", I'm excited to see what kind of magic they worked. Between that and the engagement party, I'm definitely on the excited side of the wedding planning. I cannot WAIT for that party, let me tell you. This, despite the fact that I am officially back at square one on the dress front since the manufacturer of the dress I wanted suddenly went out of business last month, the rat bastards. So yeah, woo. I get to go dress shopping. Which I am dreading. With the dreads of a thousand Rastafarians. Why? Because I am picky and also fat, which means that A) I will hate most of the dresses I try on and B) I will be surrounded by teensy squealing princesses who look great in every damn dress they try on.

I really shouldn't be so stuck on the fat thing, y'all. I've lost 30 pounds now, for crying out loud. But you know, 30 pounds on me is like...5 pounds on someone else. So, I'm rather meh about that fact today. I'm rather meh about most facts today, actually. I have no idea why that is.

Oh! In other wedding related news, we registered. Registering is hard, yo. And exhausting. And in a strange twist of fate, we went ahead and registered for fine china, which we will probably not use for at least 10 years. But hey, it's pretty, so we might go ahead and use it everyday. That would be just like me, eating dinner from fine Mikasa china with some Diet Coke in a Noritake crystal goblet while sitting on the floor in the living room watching That 70's Show. But anyway, it's done and over with so onward and upward and all that jazz.

The apartment is freakin' messy. Kev's mom got to see that we totally live in squalor most of the time. Ah well, she already loves me so oh well if she knows that her son is marrying a slob. Plus we took her to the zoo and showed her a cute baby cheetah AND the awesome pandas so she still had a good time.

This week has been pretty sucktastic so far though, in general. A lot of death in my realm. One of our employees died last Friday, massive and sudden heart attack. It was someone everyone in the group knew, so that's been hard to be around. Then last night I got an email from an old friend from high school...her grandfather, who was always so very sweet to me and who had beaten back half a dozen deadly illnesses died this weekend. So Saturday I get to go to a funeral before I go spend the day scrapbooking. Bummer, truly.

So yeah, I'm keepin' on keepin' on. Maybe by the end of the month I'll be back in the groove of this thing. In the meantime, check this out and let me know what you think.