Last week on Monday, I had a small breakdown in my boss' office, complete with tears of frustration which left him stammering his apology for letting things get so chaotic that I had said nervous breakdown. On Tuesday, I walked into his office at 4:30 and declared that I needed to leave because my husband had just lost his job. On Wednesday morning, my boss practically tiptoed into my office to tell me that he had been planning on buying me flowers to cheer me up but had gotten to the office too early and the flower shops were all closed.
So yeah, I have to admit, the last few days have found me not doing well. This is the second time this year that we've had to deal with this situation, and adding money stress to the residual stress of the robbery kinda pushed me over the edge. And there I was on Tuesday night, driving home from work, crying big fat droopy tears while listening to a Tori Amos CD (Little Earthquakes, I believe, which was the soundtrack to my angst-ridden college years). And I came home and cried on Kevin's shoulder for a while, then made a cake (which I have been dosing myself with regularly since then) and ate macaroni and cheese and started to finally feel a little better. (I figured cake was better than alcohol in this instance since alcohol is a depressant and obviously I did not need more depressing because hello, tears while driving and listening to Tori Amos is depressed enough.)
And then tonight I walked out of class and looked up at the sky just as the full moon was rising, a gorgeously huge yellow disk climbing the sky and hiding its face from time to time behind ribbons of black clouds. It's the Corn Moon, heralding the ripening of the crops and the hint of a properous harvest just around the corner. And as I looked up into the face of that moon, I was suddenly and completely at peace. What has happened has happened for a reason, and now we can do nothing but move forward.
The past seven days have been turbulent, yes. But Kevin's gotten a ton of leads, and had two interviews yesterday, has an interview tomorrow (at my company even! which is something we have been trying to get to happen since he moved down here), and another one on Friday. We've rearranged our finances to get some breathing room and discovered some nice little gems thanks to good advice from good friends. Things like...student loans can be put in forbearance and car loans can be temporarily deferred and sometimes credit card companies are willing to drop interest rates from 30% to 12% just because you asked them to. The light at the end of the tunnel is no longer the headlamp on a speeding train, and that's a very good thing indeed.
This might just be the cake talking, but I'm hoping it's not. After all, cake runs out eventually.
So yeah, I have to admit, the last few days have found me not doing well. This is the second time this year that we've had to deal with this situation, and adding money stress to the residual stress of the robbery kinda pushed me over the edge. And there I was on Tuesday night, driving home from work, crying big fat droopy tears while listening to a Tori Amos CD (Little Earthquakes, I believe, which was the soundtrack to my angst-ridden college years). And I came home and cried on Kevin's shoulder for a while, then made a cake (which I have been dosing myself with regularly since then) and ate macaroni and cheese and started to finally feel a little better. (I figured cake was better than alcohol in this instance since alcohol is a depressant and obviously I did not need more depressing because hello, tears while driving and listening to Tori Amos is depressed enough.)
And then tonight I walked out of class and looked up at the sky just as the full moon was rising, a gorgeously huge yellow disk climbing the sky and hiding its face from time to time behind ribbons of black clouds. It's the Corn Moon, heralding the ripening of the crops and the hint of a properous harvest just around the corner. And as I looked up into the face of that moon, I was suddenly and completely at peace. What has happened has happened for a reason, and now we can do nothing but move forward.
The past seven days have been turbulent, yes. But Kevin's gotten a ton of leads, and had two interviews yesterday, has an interview tomorrow (at my company even! which is something we have been trying to get to happen since he moved down here), and another one on Friday. We've rearranged our finances to get some breathing room and discovered some nice little gems thanks to good advice from good friends. Things like...student loans can be put in forbearance and car loans can be temporarily deferred and sometimes credit card companies are willing to drop interest rates from 30% to 12% just because you asked them to. The light at the end of the tunnel is no longer the headlamp on a speeding train, and that's a very good thing indeed.
This might just be the cake talking, but I'm hoping it's not. After all, cake runs out eventually.
4 Comments:
I'm glad things are looking up, sweety.
Whew! Sounds promising. ~LA
I'm so happy to hear things are looking better! You guys totally deserve a break!
Been thinking about you dear. I will ZOOMON you this weekend if the opportunity arises; you know my incoherent drunk ass always cheers you up. :)
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